The Demise Of Greggs

Disclaimer: I hope you all realise that the clickbait is absolutely oozing out of the screen at you right now for that title. (But there is a LOW-KEY smidge of honesty!)

(Photo was created and edited by me Karen’s!)

 Let’s talk about Greggs. I’m a lover not a hater, and what I can absolutely assure you is that when I woke up this morning, I did not envision myself ending the evening with an urge to slander all English Greggs franchises- but plans change and here I am. 

So there I was, this afternoon… I’d just arrived into Manchester and was excited for the week ahead. I’d browsed the area of my iPhone maps app and stumbled across Greggs, a mere 10 minute walk away. Off I trotted with a smile on my face and what was thrown in my face as I walked into the door? NO CORNED BEEF PASTY’S! I stood there stunned and gave Greggs a benefit of the doubt. Maybe they just didn’t bother with the little name tags they usually have when promoting their products; Maybe, just maybe, they were still 5 minutes from being out of the oven!  

I said in my most confident voice, “excuse me, do you have any corned beef pasty’s?” And what was I greeted with? CONFUSION AND A NO! I mellowly replied, “Oh! Okay, well can I have a sausage roll please?” (I don’t think I’d had a sausage roll for about 10 years at this point but there was no chance in hell I was sticking a steak bake down my gob!) Anyway… 

I was now sat in their outside garden bit and after excessively complaining, I had a search on Google to see if there were any corned beef pasty’s in England at all. My anxiety was telling me that, that boys look was not friendly and was more concerned for me- I had to see for myself! And guess what? Actually, I’ll just let you read the treacherous words that graced my screen. “The Scottish have haggis, the English have roast beef and the Germans have sauerkraut, now a campaign has begun that will stretch the length and breadth of Wales, to have the humble corned beef pasty recognised as a Welsh national dish.” This essentially told me everything I know. Corned beef pasty’s do not exist to the English! And you know me, I don’t do things half hearted, so I returned into Greggs (for a doughnut too) and asked an older man if ANY Mancunian Greggs had a corned beef pasty and my ego and stomach took a blow again with “corned beef pasty’s are very much a Welsh thing and you won’t find a corned beef pasty past Derbyshire, IF THAT!” 

As you can probably tell, this is a huge loss to me and as I embark on my three day getaway in Manchester, I shall feel this loss from the tips of my fingers to my toe nails, and you know what, I’m not even an avid Greggs eater, but just having now found this information out, I fear for my welsh heritage.

What I propose, is someone who isn’t me to set up a Change page, a GoFund Me for myself and for Greggs to get their ACT TOGETHER. It is essentially descrimination in the most disrespectful way! (not really but I am very dramatic). 

What if I was allergic to absolutely everything else on the menu? Surely then the workers would swoon for the girl who couldn’t have her pasty? 

Anyway, I’m not happy about it and I’ll never move out of Wales ever now. I don’t care if I miss out on the biggest career breakthrough you ever did see, I’m not missing out on my corned beef pasty’s. 

Honestly, have a look on the old Google and hurt your own feelings if you fancy.  

I now have a sour taste in my mouth and I wanted to share that to my fellow Welsh friends who admire the corned beef pasty. I’ve spoken to family and friends and NO ONE KNEW! So you’re welcome and be safe friends! It’s a scary world out there!