The Goonies (CLASSIC FILM REVIEW)

This weekend I had the pleasure of watching the 1985 masterpiece, ‘The Goonies’. With the screenplay written by Chris Columbus and Steven Spielberg and the distribution by ‘Warner Bros’, what else could we expect other than greatness?

 The Movie follows The Goonies, a group of kids on a quest to find the treasure of One-Eyed Willy, on the day
where notorious criminals break out of Prison. We see the likes of Sean Astin and Corey Feldman do what they do best as child stars and create a classic, that even us younger generation is familiar with. 

 The first thing I must mention is, what a cast! How funny is it seeing the likes of Sam of ‘Lord of the Rings’, (Sean Astin), Thanos of ‘Avengers: Endgame’, (Josh Brolin) and Teddy of ‘Stand by Me’ (Corey Feldman) run around an underground tunnel together looking for a pirates treasure! The 80’s era is quite literally the Feldman era, who starred in almost every teen movie: ‘Gremlins’, ‘The Lost Boys’, ‘Dream a little Dream’, ‘The Burbs’ and ‘Stand by Me’, to name a few! The Goonies just added to the list of movies where he played the funny best friend. The role suits him well and I don’t believe a single actor, director or production today could replicate the extraordinary franchises released in the 80’s. 

 

My favourite character, probably like other viewers is Chunk. All I did was laugh as the young boy clumsily broke everything he touched, which is ironic considering he essentially put Sloths broken heart back together. I particularly enjoyed Chunks solo adventures away from the group as he fought to break out of a freezer, persuaded Sloth to set him free of his tied-up hands and feet with the art of chocolate seduction and ran as fast as he could only to beg for help from the man who left him frightened in the first place. I loved Chunk and Sloths adventure to save the rest of the group and was surprisingly teary eyed towards the end of the movie where they were reunited and expressed their platonic love for one another. 

 

Let’s talk realism: How convenient was it for The Goonies to find a treasure map in the attic of the house they’re soon to be evicted from, leading an estimated 150 feet away from an abandoned restaurant that sits on the top of a fictional pirates billion-dollar fortune? Not to mention the restaurant was conveniently a safe house for the criminals to squat whilst on their run. Yes, I understand this was a kid’s film and the art of exaggeration exists, but it’s honestly laughable how The Goonies just got SO lucky the entire time. What with a gadget connoisseur 12-year-old that just so happened to run rings around three advanced criminals, Sloth, that no questions asked, went against his family, the antagonists, to help these young strangers, and Mouth, who did nothing but stir the pot the entire movie; no one is safe! That is what makes this movie so iconic though. It’s so absurd that children of the 80’s and today love it, and I’m sure parents don’t mind giving up one episode of EastEnders for the night to watch it too. 

 

The quality of this movie is brilliant; it’s realistic and mesmerising. The underground tunnel looked great, and the ship looked like it belonged to Jack Sparrow. I also enjoyed the characters outfits and personality traits. I think they all worked well together and the involvement of the two teen girls added an element of humour to the pubescent boys’ personalities. Although I wish Data played a bigger role, and diversity was more dominant within this movie, I loved that Data’s genius mind is what kept The Goonies consistent and ultimately led them to their treasure. His minor speech impediment was awfully cute too. 

 

I don’t know where the Goon Docks of Astoria is, but I certainly won’t be going there anytime soon. Who knows what else is hidden under abandoned buildings? Don’t get me started on the police’s inability to detain a criminal. You’d have better luck finding me picking up litter off Barry Beach than there. 

 

Very enjoyable film, not my favourite classic review though. Rated a 4.4/5 by 'Rotten Tomatoes and a 4/5 for me!

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